Curious Little Monkeys



I am a fan of science – I feel I need to say that up front. Forge ahead confidently, nay, boldly in the pursuit of knowledge. I want a time machine and a re-pet and a replicator and a goddamn spy vacation on Mars injected straight into my brain. I want vials of embryos available at Walgreens just in case I think my caffeine shakes might be early onset Parkinson’s. Maybe powdered embryos, so I can mix it up in my coffee.

But even I will occasionally adopt a “just because we can doesn’t mean we should” attitude. I recant – I’m not even going that far. I’m merely suggesting that “Let’s try it and see what happens” is not a globally applicable policy. Specifically in the following cases:

Ok, maybe try it and see what happens is ok for the robot issue. I will admit that there are appealing possibilities. But then I look at the hyper little engineer, excitedly pointing out that “The robot has no additional control from a human or a computer, its sole means of control is from its own brain.”

Huh. Right. So, we get a robot up and running, let it think for itself and remove any possibility of interfering with its actions other than, well . . . killing it. Have I summed this experiment up? Well that sounds like a top notch idea. Hey, lets put a brain in one of these things. Does it have guns on it? No? Well why the fuck not? Give someone a grant, and get them on that shit.

Can we get these guys a copy of The Terminator? 2001? The Matrix? Anything?

I’m impressed at the ballsiness of attempting to re-create the very beginnings of all we know. Really guys, super cool. I’m just curious – and only because I haven’t seen anything yet released, I’m sure this is all worked out – but what happens if the project yields successful results. What if you make a universe in the basement? Will it be a very small universe? Or will you simply halt Genesis before it gets too far? Perhaps you’ve developed a way to contain it?

The best thing about the big bang article actually has nothing to do with the experiment itself. It’s the fact that political correctness has reached it’s apex:

“In a way it’s biblical”, says Limon. “I’d like to think that this curiosity, this need to know is, if you’re not a religious person, the soul of human beings, the thing that makes us different from dogs and cats. Even though dogs and cats are wonderful”.

Our natural inquisitiveness is what separates us from the lower beasts. Not that there’s anything wrong with being a cat or dog. It’s their choice of lifestyle, and it’s beautiful and valid.

And yes, I added the zombies tag to this post. Because you just never know how it’s going to start, and this is exactly the sort of attitude that opens the door for bullshit like the undead.


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